"Dhogeh tha?"
"Noon tha?"
Can these two phrases be considered as "conversation makers"?
The loosely translated meaning of the first phrase is "Isn't it true?" while the second phrase is loosely translated as "Isn't it so?"
I have a friend who, unconsciously it seems, mentions these two phrases, almost after each statement he states. I used to think he had a self-confidence issue as he appeared to be seeking agreement to everything he says.
I don't mind him using these two phrases however often he likes as long as he continues his side of the conversation without a halt, because a pause can mean he is allowing room for me to agree with him, which I thoroughly dislike, because even if I agree with his statements, I don't like to be subtly coerced into agreement.
He once did a pause in fact, and let it hang for what seemed like a painful few minutes, but I somehow summoned the courage to face what must have amounted to an awkward silence on my part, and refrained from responding until he was forced to continue the conversation without any further input from me.
Talking about "conversation makers" also brings me to Maldivians' interesting culture of "conversation starters" (or "openers") such as "Kihineh?", loosely translated to "How (are you?)", but more interesting may be the phrase "Kobaa Kaey?" ("Where are you?"), with "Kaey" being a possible outcome of replacing the word "Kaley" ("You") because some Maldivians consider the version with a "Laamu" - or the alphabet "L" - as been rude.
There is also the possibility that "Kaey", which sounds like lazy slurred speech, originated from stoned youths.
The most notable fact may be that this phrase has all the characteristics of invading the privacy of the person addressed, because nobody has the right to know the whereabouts of that person without his or her permission.
Hence, the most privacy invading conversation "opener" between Maldivians may be "Kon thanakah thiya dhanee?" ("Where are you off to?") - a phrase used by a neighbor who would utter it without fail upon meeting me every time, much to my intolerable irritation, and it bothered me why she didn't say "Kihineh?" to inquire about my health first if she was concerned about me.
Indeed, I used to think that she was been nosy, prying into my private affairs, and one day, just as an experiment, I refrained from answering her with even a white lie such as that I was going to the convenience store.
I wanted to see how far she can tolerate the silent awkwardness of the moment without my response. As it happened, she asked me three times where I was going and it annoyed me so much that I rudely told her that she has no right to pry into my private life.
Later when I related this incident to a relative, the relative told me that the neighbor was not trying to invade my privacy but that that phrase was her way of inquiring how I was doing, and thereby, launch a polite conversation.
Weird. How I seem so out of touch with my own culture.
And strange how language can serve situations that don't apparently seem in tune with catering to the relevance of the moment.
Friday, March 10, 2023
Conversation makers?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
This may sound very antagonistic towards our own culture & people. But Maldivians are generally very shallow when it comes to thinking & having meaningful conversations.
ReplyDelete‘Koba kaey’ or ‘kihineh’ ‘ragalhu’ ‘alhamdulillah’ ‘dhen aadhaige githeh’, are actually symptomatic of lazy attempts to have conversations that don’t attempt to go deep into any serious conversations.
If you asked the most devout Maldivian fan of Shahrukh Khan who watched every single movie he acted in over more that three decades, about what he thinks of SRK the best response you could possibly get is ‘varah salhi’ or ‘hama habeys’. That’s it. Nothing more than that. Why? That’s because to go beyond that ‘varah salhi’ response requires effort. It warrants active thinking. And that’s something only very, very few Maldivians attempt to do.
Maldivians have been eating tuna for more a thousand years. But if you asked a Maldivian to describe the taste of tuna it will be ‘mas raha’. The same ‘mas raha’ also is the phrase to describe the taste of chicken, beef, mutton or the meat of an ostrich or a crocodile. ‘Badu ga ves hunnanee ‘mas’ jahaafa. Fai kudakalguvaaga ves ‘mas’. Faiga indhey ‘fala mas gadeh’ ves.
I maybe wrong on this. But I think these things signify a rather lazy approach to language & thinking. Complex vocabulary & expressive language maybe a prerequisite for complex thinking & vice versa. What do you think?
I think most people don't want to say in detail how they're doing when someone asks 'kihineh'. Or maybe people think it's none of the other person's business and so the question doesn't actually require a detailed answer since the person who asked actually doesn't care about how the other person's doing and wouldn't really want to hear all about that person's life. Maybe some people don't want to share any personal information in case somebody spreads it. Or maybe everyone knows it's just a lousy form of greeting Maldivians commonly use instead of saying Good morning, Good afternoon, Assalaamu Alaikum etc.
ReplyDeleteAnd when someone says 'Alhamdhulillahi' maybe they're conforming to the religious way of saying that however their life is, they don't want to complain by saying that they're sick or tell about what's wrong in their life and instead they thank Allah for whatever state they're in.
It's hard to imagine narrating one's life's ups and downs to people whom one hardly meets on the street like once in a blue moon, just because they asked 'kihineh?' It doesn't make sense anybody'd be actually interested in knowing how somebody else's doing just because they met them accidentally somewhere. I feel if a real answer to 'kihineh?' is needed people should voluntarily call or message the other person instead of waiting to meet them sometime somewhere in the near future.